Should You Get Married Because You'Re Pregnant?

If you have recently become pregnant, you may be thinking of getting married. Are you getting married for the right reason, however?

For an unmarried couple, pregnancy can be very difficult to cope with. There are so many different decisions for any couple to make during this time, such as what to name the baby, when you will return back to work, who will watch the baby when you return to work and so on. For the unwed couple, one of the most important decisions may be whether or not you should get married. Here are some of the things that you should ask yourself before getting married during pregnancy.

How Do You Want Your Child to Be Brought Up?

For some people, the idea of raising a child in a home without marriage is unheard of. The reason is because this is generally thought of as the traditional family and most people feel that this is the "right" way to bring their children up. However, nowadays, there are many unconventional families out there. It is not unusual for a child to come from a family where the parents are not married. It is often debated, but many feel that it is less hard on a child for their parents to never be married to begin with than to get divorced later down the road. Ultimately, you will need to be the one to decide how your child should be brought up.

Do You Really Love the Baby's Parent?

Every parent wants their child to have a good, solid home. However, if you are really not in love with the mother or father of the baby, then you should think twice before getting married. Often, many people get married simply because of a pregnancy and the relationship later ends up in divorce. While there is no doubt that you should try to make things work, some people are simply not compatible enough to have a long-lasting marriage - even if they were compatible enough to have a relationship or "fling."

Does Either of You Have Good Health Insurance?

Let's face it - medical bills can be very expensive, even with health insurance. If you have none or a minimal coverage policy, you may be wondering how in the world you are going to cover hospital visits and such. If your partner has good health insurance, then you may want to consider getting married so that you will be covered under his policy. Although this should not be the only reason to get married, it is definitely something that you going to need to think about.

How Will Both Sides of the Family Feel About It?

Although some people do not care what their families think about their marriages, there are others who really value their family members' opinions. If your family is judgmental, there are two things that they may think: 1.) Why aren't they getting married if she is pregnant? How immoral! or 2.) Why are they getting married just because she's pregnant? How convenient, they don't really love each other! What you decide should ultimately be up to you. However, if you really do value what your family thinks, then this factor may be a fairly important one.

Are There Any Reasons Not to Get Married?

Before getting married due to pregnancy, it is important to think about whether or not there are any reasons that you should not get married. This will really depend on your own personal beliefs. Some of the factors which may mean you should not get married include, but are not limited to: abuse in the relationship (both physical and emotional), bad money problems, substance abuse, lying and cheating. One or more of these factors may mean that getting married is a bad idea, but it really depends on your own values in a relationship. Keep in mind that if you are pregnant, you will be now dragging a child into whatever problems were affecting the relationship beforehand.

Do You Know Who the Baby's Father Is?

People often associate this factor only with talk shows. However, it's not at all uncommon for a woman to be unsure of who her baby's father is. Keep in mind that this factor is not meant to pass judgment. It is a situation that many women do deal with. If you are unsure of who the baby's father is, it is a good idea to have a paternity test done and get married after you know for sure. Marrying the wrong person and leading him to believe that he is the one who got you pregnant would not be right.

Have You Thought About Living Together First?

If you are worried about what others will think, it's important to keep in mind that you have already done things the "untraditional way" if you or your partner has gotten pregnant before getting married. What difference would it make if you live together before marriage, now? There are many benefits to doing this before rushing into marriage. It will allow you to see whether or not you actually want to be with the person, rather than forcing yourself to get married to him/her before the baby comes and seeing it end in divorce later on.

Ultimately, the decision to get married is your own. No one should pressure you into getting married just because you are pregnant. Although it is best to try to work things out whenever possible, if you feel strongly about not getting married because of pregnancy, you should not allow yourself to be convinced into doing something that you do not want to do.